'Oh Crap' Moments

I'll admit, lately I've been somewhat preoccupied with the topic of disappointment and the feelings that come with falling short of a goal. I think it's something that everyone can relate to, and in my opinion it's good to experience it often because it means you're taking risks. It also happens to be a recurring theme in my life that I'm constantly trying to make sense of.

On the other hand, I've had more than my fair share of successes, many of which resulted in what I call the 'Oh Crap' moment. This is the point in time when something that seemed like a good idea all along suddenly becomes frighteningly real. It's the moment we realize that the hard part isn't over, but rather it's just beginning, and we find ourselves questioning whether we really wanted it in the first place.

Last week, my teammates and I were presented with an opportunity to travel to India for a couple months to work with our team in Hyderabad. I immediately expressed my interest and later submitted a proposal for how I would approach improving collaboration between our teams. On Friday evening I found out that I had been chosen for this project and I was ecstatic. This lasted for about an hour until I realized that I would actually have to do everything I said I would do and that I will probably be working harder than I ever have in my life. This is a huge undertaking and, quite honestly, I'm having an extended 'Oh Crap' weekend.

Don't get me wrong, I'm totally up for the challenge, and I have complete faith in my abilities. That being said, I'm scared shitless to walk into an office in a foreign country with an unfamiliar culture and lead a change initiative. I can prepare night and day until I leave (in a month-ish), but there are some things that I will have to just learn as I go. I imagine this is the same way new moms feel when they find out they're pregnant, or how Barack Obama felt when he woke up on November 5th.

Fortunately, when I think about my greatest achievements, almost all of them involved an 'Oh Crap' moment at some point. Fear and doubt can be incredibly motivating, as long as we don't let it overwhelm us. Get ready, India, here I come.

'Tis the Season

I went Christmas shopping yesterday at Briarwood Mall in Ann Arbor. I usually prefer to do this sort of thing during off hours, which is why you can often find me at Target or Meijer at 10:00 on a Friday night. I hate crowds and I especially hate waiting in line, but I decided to brave the Sunday shoppers because 'tis the week for holiday social gatherings and I didn't want to interrupt my steady rise to the holiday weight hall of fame.

As I pulled into the parking lot, I turned the corner to go down the row with the intention of parking all the way at the end of it. However, after making the turn I saw a family walking toward their car, which was pretty close to the entrance. I figured that this was good parking karma coming back to me for all of the times I've chosen not to get worked up in holiday parking situations. I stopped with plenty of space for them to back out of the spot and put my blinker on like a decent, civilized human being.

Next thing I know, I see a yellow SUV about ten car lengths in front of me throw it in reverse and started barreling toward me. It was moving so fast that I was afraid it would hit me, so I looked in my rear view mirror to see if I could back up and there was another car behind me. I gripped the wheel and braced myself for impact when the SUV stopped just short of my front bumper.

I figured that at this point they'd realize their mistake and move on because I couldn't fathom the thought of someone fighting for this spot. We're talking about Briarwood Mall, not the Beverly Center. It wasn't as if there weren't several available spots at the end of the row. This was not about a desperate search for a place to park their SUV. This was a strategic move to avoid taking any more steps in a given day than what is absolutely necessary.

As I was sitting there sandwiched between the disgusting Big Bird SUV and the car behind me watching the other car careful maneuver out of the spot that was almost blocked off by the SUV, I looked up and noticed the bumper sticker on the back of their hideous vehicle. It read, "I lift Detroit in prayer." I literally laughed out loud to myself. He forgot to finish the rest of it, which likely says something like "but to hell with the rest of you."

Honestly, I hate bumper stickers, especially self-righteous ones. I mean, if you're going to tell the world what a great person you are, then you forfeit your right to drive like an ass. It's that simple. I'm not saying I've never pulled a jerk-like move on the highway, but I've certainly refrained from simultaneously bragging about my honor roll student.

While bumper stickers may seem like an easy way to voice an opinion, they give everyone else license to judge. My point? Don't be that guy. Actions always speak louder than words.